Thirty one days with Belarus
by Eevee Blossom
Summary: America is somehow talked into taking care of Belarus for a month. belarus wants to be with Russia, but then gets the wrong idea when she is told to take care of America. Will Alfred & Natalia get along? Will this end in blood? And, will Canada be known?
1. Left with nothing but Belarus

**First Hetalia fic...so don't hate on it!**

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><p>"WHAT! I'm not doing that!" America cried out after hearing Russia's ridiculous idea.<p>

"Please, just one month...that's all I am asking! I have much too many things to do next month and I can't have...Belarus...interrupting me. I NEED HER TO LEAVE ME ALONE, PLEASE!" The overly adorable Russian begged on his hands a knees. America took a good look at the man in front of him. At last, he nodded his head sadly. He was a hero, and heroes help everyone...even if the person that you are helping is a total psycho.

America sighed deeply, knowing that he might not survive an hour with the Belarussian girl.

_What have I gotten myself into?_

Russia then smiled and huged the bloonde 19-year old looking nation tightly. Russia then handed America a list of instruction for proper Belarus care and ran off.

"Okay...I guess I'll just go look for her." Alfred told himself. Another World Meeting had ended, and America had to look for Belarus in the huge World Meetings building.

_Im gonna die. Why did I agree to this! Russia's pretty bad...but Belarus...Belarus is a whole different story!_

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><p>"Big brother, what do you mean?"<p>

"I mean you are going to stay with America for a month."

"Russia, please! I don't want to go with that ideot!"

"Nataliya, I only need you to be with him for a month..."

"I wont do it!"

"No...he'll take care of you."

"I said no!"

"Please!"

"Kiss me and I'll do it!"

"Fine." Belarus then closed her eyes and puckered her lips, but Russia simply kissed her forehead.

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><p>Alfred F. Jones looked all over for Belarus...but she was nowhere to be found.<p>

_I thought i would have found her by now. If I don't find her in about 5 minnutes...im leaving._

America sighed once more as he adjusted his glasses, he put his hands in his pockets and walked a little slower.

"Sweet Jesus...you'd think I would have found her?" He told himself as he walked town the hall. He then walked around the corner and saw Belarus walking away from Russia. She had a sad, yet dissapointed look on her slavic face, wich was oh-so pretty.

"Hey, Belarus...you ready to go?"

"Don't talk to me America!" She walked past him angryly, sending off some bad vibes dude! America then looked at Russia with an extreamly serious face.

"I'll send you her things, Da." Russia then walked off. America just stood there for a while...then he went after Belarus.

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><p><strong>Canada &amp; Ukrane's commentary!<strong>

"Ukrane...how is the story playing out so far?" Canada said in his almost whispery voice. He then looked at the blonde girl next to him and waited for her response.

"I think there is still some tension between Alfred and Natalia, but the'll work out just fine." She said calmly as she showed a poorly drawn picture to Canada.

"Who are you?" Mr. Kumajiro said.

"I'm canada!" Canada said sadly. "Why doesen't anyone ever know who I am?"

"I know who you are!" Ukrane said sweetly to the blonde nation.

"Thanks! Now, back to the story!"

"Who are you?"

"I'm Canada, damnit!"

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><p>The two blonde nations walked towards the huge doors of the world conference center, located in England. Many of the other nations were getting into their personal cars, and they drove to the airport. America walked to his little personal car, wich was black and had a american flag on the antena.<p>

"Ladies first!" Alfred said as he opened the door and, to no one's surprise, hamburger wrappers, soda bottles, and old french fry containers spilled out of the small car.

"I am not getting in there, America! It's filty!" And so, America pushed Belarus into the car, shut the door, got into the front seat, and drove away.

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><p><strong>I hope you guys liked it! it's my first Hetalia fic, so please don't hate on it too much! Thank you for reading &amp; please revew!<strong>


	2. Hurt and insulted by Belarus

Belarus tried to claw the door opened after America locked it.

"Damn you!" The platinum blonde yelled at the other nation in the car. America simply tuned her out by turning up the volume on his music. "ARE YOU EVEN LISTENING TO ME!" She yelled at the top of her lungs, but there was no responce, exept fot the annoying screeching that americans called music.

"Baby...Baby...BABY..OOOOH!" America sang the most...ugh song in the world. Five seconds, and Belarus litterally puked in an old McDonald's bag. America, who was dying inside by just thinking about the horrible song, was a horrible driver and almost crashed into something every other second.

Belarus could not help but scream the whole way to the airport.

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><p><strong>Ukrane and Canada's commentary!<strong>

"IT'S NOT TIME FOR THIS SEGMENT YET! GO BACK TO THE STORY!" Both of the nations yelled.

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><p>"I...am...going...to...kill you...America!" Belarus cried out as they arived at the airport and stepped out of the car.<p>

"Aww, do ya really wanna kill me? The her-" America stopped in mid sentence after Natalya gave him the hardest kick to the groin he has ever receved.

"Shut up with your hero rants, America." Then after kicking him, she walked off to where Alfred's private jet was located. After this, poor little Alfred F. Jones slowly crawled to his private jet. The pain was just too much for him too stand up.

America finally maniged to somehow get on the plane and put an ice pack on...it. He then laid back on his favorite seat on the plane and relaxed. After a few minutes, the blonde nation maniged to fall asleep.

_Hamburger...yum._

Natalya looke at her stomach, wich grumbled uncontrollably. She followed her instinct, and stood up to look for decent food, that was not hamburgers, sodas, or french fries. The platinum blonde nation opened cabinets, and to her dissapointment, found nothing BUT burgers, fries, and soda.


	3. Belarus' mission

**Sorry for the crappy short chappie...i had to wite it all on my DSi and it wount let me write more than 361 words and all the annoying codeing crap.**

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><p><em>There's nothing to eat exept for crappy american food. I am going to starve to death! Why big brother, why do you hate me like this!<em>

Belarus sighed a big long sigh as she walked back to her seat. She sat on the really comfotable seat and noticed that at the back of each seat, was a phone. She eagerly picked one up and dialed a number.

"Hello?"

"Big brother? Why did you leave me here to die? there's nothing but America's lame excuse for food! I will starve to death if you do not save me now!"

"Belarus, you will be fine. Just take care of America for me. Everything will be fine, Da."

"Fine. I love you Big Brother! After this is over, let us bind our souls together for all eternity and- hello? DAMNIT!" Obviously Russia hung up when Belarus started ranting about 'binding their souls together for all eternity.'

_Hmm...he told me to 'Take care of America.' Oh, maybie if I do this for him, he will finally marry me! How kind fate is! Don't worry about it Big brother, America will be taken care of...and you will never have to deal with his annoying stupidity ever again!_

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><p><strong>Ukrane &amp; Canada's Commentairy!<strong>

"Okay...now do I add the vanilla?" Ukrane asked sweetly as she grabbed a bottle of the stuff.

"Yes, now you add the vanilla!" Canada instructed as Ukrane poured in vanilla into a batter.

"Canada, are you going to like these pancakes?" Ukrane asked as Canada helped her pour the pancake mix into the skillet.

"I know there going to be awesome!" Canada said happily. Then he sudently stoped as he looked at the camera. "Ukrane...our segment just started."

"Oh...hello." Ukrane said nervously. "How long has that been on?"

"Sence the part where you aked if you should add the vanilla." A voice that sounded a exatcly like Austria said. Canada, Ukrane, and Austria stared at eachother for a while...then Hungary broke the silence.

"Can we please just continue?" Hungary said sweetly.

"Sorry Elizabeta, the mood died." Canada said grimly.

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><p><strong>12:34 A.M New York time.<strong>

the plane was flying over the skies of New York city as they started to approach their destination. Belarus finished sharpening tha knife that she would use to 'take care of America.' She walked towards his seat where he was still sleeping. She lifted the sharp blade over his chest & got ready to stab the blonde nation

_Aww...now that I take a good look at him, he is kind of cute...wait what! No, bad Natalya. You love Big Brother, you just have not eaten...it is driving you to insanity. That's all._

Belarus then brought it down, but a suden tremor shook her. So she ended up stabing the floor after she fell. The saking continued.

"We have hit some turbulance, so the rest of the ride's gonna be pretty shaky." The pilot anounced. Belarus noticed that the saking was starting to wake up America, so she grabed her knife and ran off.

"Damnit!" The platinum blonde nation mumbled as she ran off.

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><p><strong> Okay...that chappie is finally done. Thanks for the epic revews for chapters 1 and 2. Thanks for reading &amp; please revew.<strong>


	4. America has dirty thoughts

**okay kiddies...im putting all my other fics on pause for this. So you pplz will probably see more updates and crap**

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><p>"Your country looks like shit, America." Belarus complained. America simply looked at her with a dissapointed face. He was really hopeing she would like McDonald's.<p>

Soon after saying that, Belarus threw the greasy hamburger at the nation in front of her.

"Okay fine. We'll just go to my place." America said as he stood up. Belarus nodded and also stood up. As they were walking out the door, Alfred ran back and ate Belarus' burger.

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><p><strong>Ukraine &amp; Canada's commentary!<strong>

Ukraine looked at the camera okwardly.

"Austria, what happined to the camera...and what happined to you!" She said with a surprised tone. Austria was covered in yellow feathers and the camera was covered in what looked like honney.

"Prussia..." Austria said in a very annoyed tone.

"Oh...okay. Canada's out sick today...so no comments." She said before Austria shut off the camera.

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><p>America stepped out of his bedroom with a very stressed face. Belarus had been ordering him around for the past five minnutes...and he didn't like it. He was hoping Natalya would stop trying to kill him, reasons that were unknown to him, but he wanted her to see that he was not as bad as most other nations say he is. Most of all, he wanted Belarus to play Black Ops with him.<p>

"Belarus! I want to show you something!" He declared with that loud voice of his in front of the room she would be staying. He waited for the platinum blonde's response...but nothing came. Then he just opined the door...to see his guest in nothing but a navy blue bra & matching panties.

"OH MY GOD, BELA, I'M SO SORRY!" Alfred yelled out after seeing Natalya's half nudity. His face turned a bright scarlet as he avoided knives.

"AMERICA GET THE FUCK OUT YOU HORNY BASTARD!" Belarus yelled out as she covered herself in her nightgown, and threw knives and anything else she could find. America finally ran out after about thirty seconds, his face still looking like one of Romano's beloved tomatoes. Natalya's usually pale face slso turned red, most of it was from anger, but a small bit was from the horrible embarrisment that America saw her half naked. She would usually be much more embarased, but the anger was so great that it kicked the embarassment in it's vital regions. Then after replaying it all in her head, Belarus slipped on her nightgown and locked the door.

__

_Oh God. That was just...just. Unexpected! Maybie...I can sneak another peek. WHAT AM I THINKING? NO...bad Alfred! You are not France! Sometimes I disgust myself. But...still! The Hero finally gets a reward!_

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><p><strong>Ukraine &amp; Canda's commentairy<strong>

"I can't belive Alfred would think that way!" Canada spoke with almost no sound. The Canadian was suffering from a pretty bad cold, and the 'C & U Commentairy' staff was surprised tha he had enough energy to get out of bed. Hungary, being the make-up artist, had to come in once in a while to give Matthew a new box of tissues. Ukraine looked at her partner in crime, then gave him a nice hug.

"You should not have gotten out of bed. You are much to ill!" Ukraine said with a worried tone. Canada smiled at her thoughtfulness, but the fever suddenly took him down.

"Oh dear! Mr. Canada's fever knocked him out!" Hungary said, with that worried tone in her voice. Austria then rushed to the silent nation's side while Ukraine simply petted his blonde hair. After that, Mr. Kumajiro turned off the camera.

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><p>Belarus sat in a corner of the room and thought to herself. She knew that Russia wanted America out of the picture, but with the incident, she also wanted him gone.<p>

"I will teach that stupid America to come into a lady's room without knocking first. That pervert!"

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><p><strong>America has dirty thoughts! Whatever! If you people are worried about Canada, he'll be fine. Thanks for revewing &amp; please revew!<strong>


	5. Prussia's red string of death Part 1

**Alright kiddies...there will be a lot of Prussia's self declared awesomeness in this chappie! You may be asking why...Because Gilbert & Gilbird want to interrupt the regurlarly schedualed programming. In other words...lotta Ukraine & Canada comentairy in this.**

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><p>It was 5:32 P.M. eastern time. Natalya was sleeping and Alfred was watching crap tons of superhero movies. It was an average American's day...but with an insane Belorussian girl in your house.<p>

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><p><strong>Ukraine &amp; Canada's commentairy!<strong>

"We interrupt your regurarly scheduled romancey crap with this awesome anouncement...AWESOME IS IN THE HOUSE, BABY!"

"PRUSSIA, SHUT UP YOU SELF OBSSESED ASS!" A obviously pissed Austrian yelled at the ex-nation next to him. "You're not even a country anymore, why are you here?"

"Because...Your guy's lame show where you spy on Belarus & America needed some AWESOME!" Prussia yelled out in delight. In response...Austria face palmed himself. Hungary death glared the albino ex-nation, while Canada & Ukraine simply stood quiet and hoped to be unnoticed.

There was an okward long silence, before Katyusha broke it with a sneeze.

"Bless you." Mattie said in that whispery little voice of his.

"Whatever! Me and Gilbird are gonna go and mess with the subjects!" Prussia announced as he started walking away.

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><p>Belarus walked through the now darkened halls of America's house. She had two goals in mind: eat proper food and kill Alfred F. Jones. She quietly made her way to the kitchen, and she looked trought the pantry as if she had been there many times before.<p>

After a search that only took about three minuttes, she walked out of the pantry with the most proper uncookable food she could find, cookies. A unopened box of Hungarian cookies covered in fine sugar. She smiled after looking at the small box. She noticed there was a note attached to the cookies that, obviously, were not store bought.

_To: Mr. America_

_From: Hungary_

_Dear Mr. America,_

_Here's those cookies you wanted. The ones Italy always says I made when he lived in Mr. Austria's house when Holy Roman Empire was still around. _

_Please enjoy them, they took a while to make._

_-Hungary_

Belarus then took another look at the cookies and thought if it really would be right to eat them now. She dicede to eat them, sence it would not be right to leave perfectly good Hungarian cookies for America to eat after she finished him off. She then carefully opened the the box of cookies, and she ate them as fast as possible.

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><p><strong>Prussia's Awesomeization of Ukraine, Canada, Austria, &amp; Hungary's weird little section where they spy on America &amp; Belarus...then post it on the UN website.<strong>

Prussia easily made his way through the streets of New York City, compleatly unnoticed. Most people would have trouble walking to the famous house of Alfred F. Jones, but Prussia was so awesome, that his awesomeness killed the horrible pain in his feet, because he was just that awesome. Somehow, the house was not too far from the actual city, just a few two or three miles away from the outskirts.

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><p>Belarus happily nibbled the Hungarian cookies as she savored the sweet flavor.<p>

_After this is all over, I should ask Hungary for the recepie! These cookies are delightfuly awesome!_

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>America was slowly, oh so slowly, falling asleep on that couch of his. All he could think of was falling asleep, so he let himself drift off peacefully, not noticeing he dropped the TV remote that was in his hand.<p><p>

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><p>Brlarus heard a light thump as she hoped that America finally had fallen asleep. She stepped lightly to where the knives where. She easily illed out the sharpest one and walked to Sleeping Alfred's couch. She took her time and litterally danced there. Her joy and blood thirst was so great that she could not help it. She danced her way to Alfred's death couch and raised the knife over his chest.<p>

"This is for you, big brother. Now, goodnight America." She said as she plunged the knife into Alfred's heart. America imediatly woke up and started screaming in horrible pain. Natalya then walked off to her room while hearing America's pained screams. And so, the Belorussian smiled.

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><strong><strong>

**OOH suspence! This is gonna be a two part chappie. So yeah...keep reading and revewing!**


	6. Prussia's red string of death Part 2

**i got this idea for a fuking angsty Hungary/Austria fic...umm if I ever feel like figuring out how to start that...you will probably start seeing it around the part where this fic reaches the climax...or sometime this week. Trolololo**

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><p>Prussia was nearing the mansion, when he heard screams. He stopped for a moment and turned to Gilbird.<p>

"Damn it...can't mess with them if Belarus kills America." Gilbird agreed and flew after Prussia when he started running. Prussia ran about two minuttes untill he reached America's mansion. He opined the door, because it was unlocked, and he ran to where America's screams were. There was only a little bit of light and it was comming from the TV. There was a puddle of blood growing on the flor, and Gilbert then knew he had to act fast.

"Damn it Natalya." The albino ex-Nation said to himself as he pulled the knife out of Alfred's bearly concious body. America's breathing was labored, and he was weak. Gilbird flew around the house and he found bandiges. Prussia ripped America's shirt off and quickly wrapped it around the dying Nation's chest.

"Peep Peep!" Gilbird peeped as he motioned towards the blood on the floor and on the couch.

"Gilbrd, youre right. He has lost too much blood. Go get me a plastic bag, and a small tube." Gilbert ordered and his feathered companion flew off. Imediatley, Prussia grabbed the knife on the floor, and he cut one of his veins. The Prussian flinched as the blade cut throught his skin.

Gilbird flew back with a bag and a small tube. He watched the Ex-Nation cut America's arm. Then he grabbed the bag and let his Prussian blood flow into it. he stuck the tube into Alfred's arm and connected it to the bag, wich Gilbird punctured.

"That...that'll do it." He said as the bag became almost full of blood. He patched up his wound with a cloth that he got from America's shirt. Prussia waited for all of the blood to get into Alfred's system before he took of the bag. Gilbird then flew into Gilbert's pocket and pulled out a long red string. "Aww yeah!"

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><p><strong>Okay kiddies! That's all for now!<strong>

**THX 4 RVWNG ND PLZZ RVW!111!1! Lol noob talk!**

**Translation: Thanks for revewing & please revew!**


	7. America's moobies are cold? Lolwut?

**Ukraine & Canada's commentairy**

"So...tired." Prussia said, obviously being tired. The others looked at him with a type of look that I can't really describe.

"Wow...just wow." Kumajiro said in his Kumajiro-ish tone. Hungary looked at the bear and nodded.

"I know my sister...and she will kill you if she finds out." Ukraine said.

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><p>Belarus woke up nice and early to enjoy the silence. She was enjoying it so much, the idea of never hearing America's voice again, untill the heard a pained scream.<p>

"Oh God, please don't let him still be alive...PLEASE!" She then walked to where the scream came from and litterally almost cried after seeing America still alive.

"OH MY GOD! MY CHEST HURTS SO MUCH! MY MOOBIES!" America screamed out as Belarus beat herself up behind the staircase. belarus then made up her mind to kill him later. She then came out from behind the staircase and walked up to him.

"Aww, Belarus! Dudette, can ya help me here?" Belarus simply glared at Alfred. "Please! That whole nakedness thing was an accident! Sorry! Just help me!" Natalya then smiled evily and she punched Alfred in the gut.

"That's for seeing me mostly naked. So, what do you want?" America then pointed to his shirt that was on the floor.

"My moobies are naked..." Natalya's eyes widened as she saw shirtless America, she had somehow not noticed that. She then turned away to hide her now red face.

"No..."

"Why?"

"You just want me to touch you! You can do it by yourself."

"I can't! i already tried and it hurt!"

"No."

"Please Bela!"

"Do it yourself and take it like a man!"

"But Bela, it hurts! And my moobies are getting cold!"

"Stop refering to your chest like that! And stop calling me Bela!"

"But i like saying moobies!"

"Stop it! It sounds weird...like some type of hooker cow or something."

"Cool! But seriously dude, HELP ME!"

"No."

"Please!"

"No."

"Pretty please with a burger on top?"

"Fine."

"Really?"

"No."

"PLEASE! I'LL LOVE YOU FOREVER!" Belarus then blushed harder as America slapped a hand over his mouth.

"Do you want me to kill you?"

"No...i'm sorry! I usually only use that on Iggy or Mattie!"

"I hate you right now..."

"Please just help me...please...Belarus...I'm begging you...please." Belarus then turned to look at America, gave Belarus the puppy dog face. America simply looked away sadly, wich somehow hurt Belarus a little to see him so sad. She knew it was all an act, but he preformed so well and used Belarus' pity to make her do what he wanted her to do.

"Fine...just stop making that face!" Belarus almost couldn't stop herself from awwing.

"Really...thank you!" He then smiled in a way that made Belarus want to hug him. She then grabbed the shirt off the ground and tried to put it on America without actually touching him, with failed.

_Too much physical contact. He's probably enjoying this._

America kept a straight face, but was blushing the whole time...untill Belarus accidentaly touched him in his private square.

"I'm leaving now!" Belarus then quickly walked off to wash her hands.

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><p><strong>Done with that chappie...oh if you guys are wondering:<strong>

**Times Belarus "Accidentally" touched America and where:**

**Arm- 2**

**Chest- 4**

**Leg- 1**

**face- 0**

**Hand- 0**

**Uhh...Vital reagonz- 1 while she was pulling his shirt down...lolwut?**

**Thanks for all of the epic revews & continue revewing because that would be awesome!**

**If you are a dude and you revew...Belarus will put your shirt on for you and "accidentally" touch you in teh vitalz***

**Don't read the asterisk**

***Belarus will not do that at all...you will just get a virtual hi-5. ;3**


	8. Belarus Kissu Tony & Mochimerica

**One Week Later, Da?**

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><p><em>Dear big Brother,<em>

_WHY? DO YOU NOT WANT US TO BE TOGETHER FOREVER? WHY DO YOU LEAVE ME HERE WITH THIS IDEOT? Please, take me back._

_Loving you forever,  
>Belarus<em>

_P.S: MARRY ME...MARRY ME...MARRY ME...MARRY ME...MARRY ME...MARRY ME...MARRY ME...MARRY ME...MARRY ME...MARRY ME...MARRY ME...MARRY ME...MARRY ME...MARRY ME...MARRY ME...MARRY ME..._

"Oh God...She's insane." Russia told the three Baltic states after reading that.

"Mr. Russia, May I please see that letter?" Lithuania asked. Russia then gave him the letter, and then Toris grabbed a Pen and rewrote the letter:

_Dear ######## Lithuania,_

_#### DO YOU ### WANT US TO BE TOGHETHER FOREVER? ############################## Please, take me #### and love me._

_Loving you forever,  
>Belarus<em>

__P.S: MARRY ME...MARRY ME...MARRY ME...MARRY ME...MARRY ME...MARRY ME...MARRY ME...MARRY ME...MARRY ME...MARRY ME...MARRY ME...MARRY ME...MARRY ME...MARRY ME...MARRY ME...MARRY ME...__

"Yes Belarus, I will marry you!" Lithuania said daydreaming. he held the letter close and he smiled.

"You scare me." Latvia said.

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><p>"Aww, Belarus? Why won't you play against me in Black Ops?"<p>

"Because...it's stupid...And even if I did accept your offer, you would win." She said with her icy tone.

"Well, I could teach you!" Then the male nation smiled at the female nation.

"No." She then glared at him and walked away. America continued to play untill a girlish scream came from the hallway. He pused the game and he ran towards the scream.

"WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT?" Natalya pointed at a small alien looking figure wich was Tony.

"Oh that's Tony! He's my friend!"

"HE'S A FUCKING ALIEN!" Belarus then pulled out a knife and jumped at the small confused alien.  
>"Here...I'll get rid of it for you!"<p>

"Belarus!" America then put his arms around the platinum blonde's waist and restrained her. "Please don't hurt him! He won't do anything to you!"

"But!"

"I promise!"

"Fine." Belarus then sighed deeply and put the knife away. America then, in return, let go of her.

"He's totally nice if you get to know him! Tony, this is Belarus, the other country I told you about." Tony smiled and took Belarus's hand and kissed it, well the Alien equivalent for kissing a girl's hand. And he kept kissing it, untill the point where America snapped.

"Okay! Tony...I think she gets it! You can stop!" Tony then gave America a look. America grew somewhat angry because of Tony's hello.

"Well, it was nice meeting you Tony." Tony then smiled and walked away.

"Okay! That just reminded me of someone else I want you to meet! Follow me!" Alfred then grabbed Natalya's hand and ran.

He burst through the back door into a beautiful garden with flowers.

"WERE HERE!" America anounced loudly. Belarus looked around curiously.

"Who am I suppoded to be meeting?" Natalya turned to look at Alfred, but she had something pressed against her lips. Belarus just stared at America as he smiled and kept the little white round thing in a lip lock with her.

It was almost three minutes when Alfred finally moved away whe white thing. Natalya then noticed it had sky blue eyes and glasses, just like America.

"WHAT WAS THAT FOR?" She yelled at the top of her lungs. There was a light blush on her cheecks.

"He asked me to...this is Mochi America! Japan gave him to me for birthday." belarus then looked at the Mochi and poked it.

"Weird...just weird."

"You can say that as much as you want...but you know you liked it!" After hearing that, Belarus imediatly slapped America.

"You and your...thing... are both weird." She said before walking back into the house. Mochi America then let out a squeaky noise.

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><p><strong>ok...that's all floks!<strong>

**thanks for revewing & please revew!**

**If you do and you're a girl...Mochi America will kiss you***

***No...no he won't. You just get a virtual hi-5!**


	9. America has sweaty hands

Ring...ring ring...beeeep.

_New text message from Poland:_

_Hey America...I've already been to heaven wit Toris...It was boring so, like, after five minnutes I was like 'Let's go!" It was like...totally a huge waste of my time._

America, Belarus, Tony, and Mochi America just looked at the text message.

"What?"

"That dosen't make any sence...at all."

"What a dumbass."

"SQEEEEEEEE!" Alfred shut the phone off as Mochi America went back to eating his leattuce, Tony went back to playin his game, and Belarus went back to...doing something. America then walked up to her and watched what she was doing.

"Watcha doin?"

"None of your buisness." Then she went back to...knitting.

"But you're knitting."

"Well, now you know...now leave."

"Watcha makin?"

"Nothing."

"Well, it's not nothing if you're doing something."

"Leave before I poke your eye out." America then walked to where Tony and Mochi America were. He looked at the pair sadly.

Tony and Mochi America both looked at each other and nodded. Mochi America jumped on Human America's head and Tony dragged the nation to a room upstairs.

"Squee..."

"He's right...you are hopeless." Tony said. Mochi America then jumped on to Tony's head and then they both glared at America. Alfred simply pouted and then sat on the floor.

"Squee!" Mochi America squeed at America.

"Yeah! Youre right Mochi me! I sould ask her to that whole easter thing we're having at the White House!" America's face lit up with delight as he poked his Mochi counterpart. Tony's expression then darkened, so did Mochi America's.

"If you don't, Mochi and me will jump you!" America then looked at the alien and Mochi.

"You guys ain't serious...are ya?" Alfred stared at his friends innocently...and there expressions said: 'Bitch...we eez as serious as evah!'  
>"Oh...you are serious."<p>

"Squee!"

"You have until 3:23 to ask her...or else."

"But it's only 3:18!"

"THEN GET YOU'RE SORRY ASS DOWN THERE!" America then got up and ran downstairs.

* * *

><p><strong>Canada &amp; Ukraine's commentairy!<strong>

"Stop dancing!" Austria yelled at the top of his lungs. Ukraine and Canada were doing a little dance that they saw in one of Japan's cosplay videos.

"Mr. Austria, let them dance. There still young and they need to enjoy life! Plus...that dance is so cute!" Hungary watched the pair dance.

"Fine...but it's cutting into film time."

"Don't worry. It's almost over." The song finally ended and the pair sat in their chairs. They started their introduction to the show.

"Hey Canada, how do you feel about my sister stabbing your brother?"

"He deserved it."

"WHAT!" Austria, Kumajiro, Ukraine, and Hungary yelled out in perfect unision.

"He's a douche!"

"You know...he is!" Hungary pointed out.

"THANK YOU!"

* * *

><p>America hid behind the staircase and watched Belarus knitting. His hands were sweatty and his heart was about to skip 15 beats. He then finally decided to man up and ask her the question.<p>

"Hey...Natalya?" Belarus then turned to look at America.

"Yes?"

"I was wondering...so...on Sunday...ummm..."

"JUST SPIT IT OUT!"

"WANNA-COME-WITH-ME-TO-THE-EASTER-THING-ON-SUNDAY?"

"What?"

"On sunday the President is having this Easter thing...and I was wondering if you wanted to come with me."

"It's nowhere near Easter! Are you Americans really that stupid?"

"Oh...sorry! It wasn't easter...it was Alice in Wonderland!"

"So it's a performance?"

"No...every year...the President has a game of tag with three other Countries and their rulers. This year's theme is Alice in Wonderland...and I thought I would invite you because...you look a lot like Alice." A bright red blush appeared on the American's face as he looked down nervously.

"Who else is going to be there?"

"Umm...Iggy...Seychelles, and Finland I think."

"I really have nothing better to do...especially sence Big Brother is not here and I can't ask him to marry me at the moment."

"Thanks...I gotta go!" Then the nervous nation ran upstairs as quickly as possible. He threw a door open and ran into one of the many empty guest rooms in his house. He then leaned against the door and slid down slowly untill his butt was on the ground. He clenched his chest and smiled.

"Wow...I thought she would kill me."

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><p><strong>Thanks for revewing &amp; please revew :3<strong>


	10. Belarus is mean!

**I gots bitten by a caaaaaaaaat. :3 lol it hurts XD**

* * *

><p>"HEY BELARUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUS! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" America said as he ran into her room.<br>"Oh...she's sleeping." Then he walked off.

"...Big Brother...marry me." She sometimes speaks in her sleep...it's creepy.

* * *

><p><strong>Sometime later<strong>

Belarus sat outside, looking at the sky. She breathed in the american air as she ran her fingers through her platinum blonde hair.

"I knever knew America would be so hospitable. I tried to kill him many times, but he still accepts me as if I was a homeless child. I wonder why." She then sighed deeply and stood up.

"Maybie he is one of the few countries that actually care about me, like Big Sister Ukraine." Then she walked back into the house.

As she entered the house, America glomped her.

"AMERICA! You are heavy!"

"Sorry!" Then the 19 year old looking nation backed off.

"You are brainless."

"And you need to learn how to chill."

"ідыёт"

"Huh? Bela! i don't know what you are saying!"

"Idiot."

"Oh...ok!"

_He just takes it...he's so weird._

"Natalya, Im gonna teach you to take it easy! All this seriousness ain't good for someone like you."

"Well, unlike you, us other nations take our jobs seriously. We **need** to take our jobs seriously. Not everyone gets to be a nation." She then glared at the nation in front of her.

"Bela! But we are immortal! Were nations! Let the ordinary humans deal with that stuff! We have thousands of years to do anything we want! Everything will be fine!"

"You just take everything for granted. If you weren't a nation, if you were a ordinary human, you wouldn't be here right now. Don't take your immortality for granted. Most great nations, the ones who think their rule will last forever, nations like the Ancent Roman Empire, Babylon, The Ottoman Empire, and even The Holy Roman Empire, they...they all fell. They were destroyed. Some, like Ancent Rome are somehow still alive. The Ottoman empire became Turkey. But, nations like Babylon and Holy Rome, there dead. You don't hear about them these days because someone somewhere found a way to finish them off. If you keep acting like this, America, you will meet your destruction faster than you can eat one of your beloved hamburgers." And then, the platinum blonde nation walked away.

"Damn..."

* * *

><p><strong>Ukraine &amp; Canada's commentairy!<strong>

"DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANG!" Austria, Hungary, and Canada said in perfect unison.

"She always says hurtful things like that...mostly to Toris." Katyusha said calmly.

"Still!" Austria said with a very surprised tone.

* * *

><p><strong>Hey, guess what. PRESIDENT WEARIN FUNNEH CLOTHES NEXT CHAPPIE! yup! You ain't high, next chapter is the Alice in Wonderland tag extravaganza! <strong>

**the United States of America vs the United Kingdom of Great Brittan and Northen Ireland vs the Republic of Belarus vs the Republic of Seychelles! :3 (yus...I founds all there official namezzz)**

**Thanks for revewing & please revew!**


	11. Belarus in Crackland

**I liek ceriaaaaaaaaaal. :3 ALICE IN WONDERLAND CRACK CHAPPIE!**

* * *

><p>The sun rose sending out beams of light everywhere. Belarus smiled when the warm rays of light gently snuggled her cheeks.<p>

"Belaaaaaa..." A soft voice whispered. Belarus simply shrugged it off and went back to her dozed sleep.

"Natalyaaaaaa..." The voice said once more. She ignored once again.

"BELARUS, WAKE UP!" Belarus then immediatly woke up and noticed a pair of sky blue orbs right in front of her.

"AMERICA! GET OFF!" She yelled angryly. Alfred then scooted away to a different corner of the huge bed. He was wearing pijamas, like the ones 10 year olds wore. They were red and blue, and on the shirt it said: 'Im the Hero!' and on the pants there were little pictures of dogs wearing super hero outfits.

"What...are...you...wearing?"

"Oh...these! there my favorite!"

"They're so childish!"

"So?"

"You look like an over grown 10 year old."

"No I don't...I look like-"

"Don't...say...it." Belarus said mecingly. America gave her a smile.

"A..."

"Don't...or I will kill you!" Belarus then pulled out her knife as America started to slowly walk towards the door.

"HERO!" He then ran out the door. Natalya jumped out of bed, wearing nothing but her sky blue nightgown and her unmentionables underneath that. Alfred laughed the whole time, like if he was enjoying it.

_That idiot...why is he laughing? I think he's enjoying this!_

She then stopped.

"Natie! Why'd you stop! I'm training you."

"For what?"

"For the 3...well in this case 4 nation annual tag game! It's today!" Belarus then looked at America. She stayed silent for a bit, then she sudenly became surprised.

"THAT'S TODAY? I THOUGHT IT WAS IN TWO WEEKS!"

"It's okay...we still have..." He then looked at a nearby clock. "Half an hour to get ready. No biggie."

"HALF AN HOUR?" She then ran back to the room. America simply walked to his room after that. He looked at Mochimerica and Tony.

"You fucking limey...you didn't tell her yet, did you?"

"No..."

"SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"

"Mochi Me...you're right...gotta man up!" He then walked out of his room and towards Belarus'. He knocked the door a bit.

"America?"

"Yes?"

"I...I have nothing to wear!"

"Why don't you wear your usual clothes?"

"Because...I don't wan't to look like I don't care."

"Oh...wait here...I think I have something." Belarus then leaned against the door and slowly slid down untill her butt was on the floor. She ran her fingers through her hair repetidley untill she thought it was smooth enough. She sighed deeply and closed her eyes.

"Brother..."

* * *

><p>America opened a box that was once in his storage room.<p>

"Good thing that I kept this around." He said to himself as he dug through the contents of the box. He then pulled out a sky blue dress. The dress was made of a silky fabric, probably silk or satin. It looked almost like Natalya's usual dresses but the sleaves were shorter.

"I still wonder why Iggy gave it to me...weird." He then ran to Belarus' room in a hurry.

_Know what...not telling Belarus. She'll kill me._

* * *

><p><strong>Ukraine &amp; Canada's Commentairy!<strong>

"Wow...America was right." Canada said as he looked at a laptop.

"Belarus can never see this...ever." Ukraine said with a scared tone. She then typed in something very quickly.  
>"I can't belive he would be so open about something like this. In a way, I'm happy for him, but then Belarus comes into all of this. She can never find out about this."<p>

* * *

><p><strong>Half-an-Hour later<strong>

"Were here!" America anounced as he ran towards Seychelles, The president of Seychelles, England, The Queen of England, and Obama.

"What do you mean by 'were'?" Seychelles asked, but then gasped at the sight of Belarus gracefully walking towards them. America then smiled when Belarus brushed up against him accidentally.

England was wearing a very formal looking suit, but he was also wearing white rabbit ears and a little fluffy bunny tail.

Seychelles was wearing a flowery pink dress. Instead of her usual ribbons, flower petals were gently tied in her hair.

America was wearing a suit similar to Brittan's, the only difference is that he was wearing a top hat and his image looked a but sloppy.

"Miss Belarus, I didn't know you would be joining us today." Obama siad happyly. His outfit was kind of...let's say 'JESUS LORD! WHAT IS HE WEARING?' He decided to dress up like that butterfly dude. Just imagine Obama wearing a leotard, a tutu, and wings. It's a bit life scarring if you think about it.

"Yes. America invited me."

"What a gentleman! I never knew he was capable of that." The Queen stated. She was dressed up as the queen of hearts. Her dress was a bright scarlet red with jet black hearts. She wore her usual crown and she was holding a soft heart pillow.

"Aww! Queeny! Why you so mean?" Alfred said playfully. Arthur then smacked the younger nation for calling the Queen 'Queeny'.

The three leaders then walked towards the White House while the four nations stayed outside.

"Okay...this is how the game works. One person will be it. When the game starts, the person who's it will have to give the others a five minnute head start. The others have the whole city and the forest outside the city to hide. Now, rock paper siccors for who gets to be it." America explained.

"America...that is so childsh!" England yelled at his former colony, but America just gave him the finger.

They did the usual paper rock siccors thing. Seychelles and Belarus both got siccors. America got rock, leaving England with paper.

"Damn it!" Belarus, America, And Seychelles then started running, trying to get as far away from the White House and, more importantly, Iggy.

* * *

><p><strong>THE SUSPENCE! I'll give anyone a cookie if you can succesfully figure out what America can't tell Belarus, what Website Ukraine &amp; Canada were looking at &amp; who there all talking about.<strong>

**thanks for revewing & please revew!**


	12. Belarus in Crackland 2

**ALICE IN WONDERLAND PART 2 MUTTHA FUUKKAZZZ! Oh and if you are wondering about Finland...ai will explain ett in deez chappieh! Oh...remember the Prussia's red string chappies, this is where the awesome prank comes in.**

* * *

><p>Belarus ran through the crowded streets of Washington DC, looking back ocasionally to see if England was behind her. He was not.<p>

"Damn Nyan Cat song!" A voice said, Belarus then ran into a random building. She looked out the window and saw England walking by. She breathed in deeply knowing that he had not seen her.

* * *

><p><strong>Canada &amp; Ukraine's Awesome, Musical, Fangirlish comentairy!<strong>

It was dark. A few moans and squeaks were hear as the light sudenly appeared. A Hungarian, A Prussian, A Austrian, A Ukranian, and A Canadian were all standing around a chair. The chair had someone sitting on it. That someone had a sack on their head and was tied to the chair with chains.

Hungary grabbed the sack and pulled of the person's head. The person, was Finland. The blonde finnish looked at the other nations. He had tears in his eyes and his mouth was covered with duct tape. Prussia ripped it off.

"AHHHHHHHH! PRUSSIA, WHY?"

"Because, we need information out of you, Kesese."

"Umm...I don't think this is such a good idea." Canada said quietly & Ukraine nodded.

"SHUT UP, CANAIRY!" The Frying Pangle yelled out.

Canada then started crying a little, and Ukraine gave him a hug. The Frying Pangle then looked at Finland and smiled evily.

"Finland...Finland...sweet little Finland. We want something from you." Hungary spoke in a somewhat seductive voice. Finland looke away as tears trickled down his cheecks. Austria then took a whip from a nearby table.

"I'll do whatever you want just don't hurt me!" Tino cried out, his voice broken and whiney.

"That's all we want from you, Tino. Now, tell us what you know about today's tag game.

* * *

><p>America took a deep breath and he looked at the sky above him.<p>

"Everything's gonna be fine." He smiled, but then that smile faded when his pinkie finger on his right hand started feeling uncomftrable. He noticed that a thin red string was tied around it. The nation tugged and pulled at it, attempted to rip it off, but it was tied on there tight.

"The fuck? Why wont it get off?" He then went ito a building and asked for scissors. They gladly let the 19 year old looking nation use a pair. He tried cutting the string, but it could not be cut. So, what do you do when there is no way to cut a string, you follow it and see where it takes you. And that is exactly what Alfred did.

* * *

><p>Belarus looked out the window, making sure England was gone. He was, so Belarus walked out of the store and started to walk towards the forest in the outskirts of DC. She could still see England, so she walked a bit slower. The blonde nation started to turn around. Natalya gasped in fear of beeing seen, so she quickly ran into an alley. It was dark and long and dirty. (Thats what she said! :D) Natalya backed up a little more. Then she decided to run deeper into the alley way. She then regreted it after someone put a hand over her mouth. She reached for her knife and imediatly stabbed the person behind her. She looked at the now hurt possible rapeist and noticed that he totally looked like a freaking rapeist. So she ran out of the alley as soon as possible.<p>

* * *

><strong> alright kiddies! I hope that will keep you readers happy untill the next chappie! Morgan, youre the only one who guessed, and even though it was nowhere near what I have, you still get a virtual cookie because youre the only one who guessed. And the President of Seychelles outfit is about as dirturbing as Obama's O.O whatevz thanks for revewing &amp; please revew<strong> 


	13. Belarus in Crackland 3: IggySey meth

**Hi there! I would like to say a few things before I start the randomness. Blood on the Sunflowers, your entry was unfortunatley disquilified sence it did not meet the required feilds. Sorrehz if I sounded mean, so you can haz a "Imm Sorreh" Cookie! Second, Suomi(Finland) owes meh money...Third, Seychelles/Iggy in this chappie...that is all! O.O**

* * *

><p>Belarus walked down the street, compleatly calm. She placed her knife in her shoe, wich had one of those knife holder things inside.<p>

* * *

><p>Seychelles had already made it to the forest. After all, America never said anything about having a taxi take you to places.<p>

"I Hope that eyebrow bastard won't find me. He's probably still lost in the city!" The Seychellois girl said proudly.

"Oh really? If I am still in the city, then why am I on this tree?" Seychelles turned around and saw England, standing proudly on a tree branch. Seychelles' inner instincts kicked in, and she ran.

_Silly girl, she thinks she can run from me, especially when I have magic on my side!_

England then pulled out his wand, said some things that cannot really be understood, and dissapeared.

* * *

><p>America, still obsessed with the string on his finger, kept following it. It wasn't long untill he crashed into something. It was actually pretty soft, but Alfred still fell from the impact. He looked up and saw something pretty familar. Something he really, REALLY wanted to get his hand's on. So, he pleased himself and gave it a gentle pet, then he got naughty and squeazed it. He imediatley regretted it when there was a knife pearcing his hand.<p>

"Natalya, why?"

"Because, YOU TOUCHED MY ASS!" Alfred then made an excuse for touching Belarus' ass.

"I thought it was a marshmellow." He said nervously.

"No you didn't!"

"I thought it was a pillow?"

"Liar! You just wanted to touch my arse! Only big brother Russia has the privilage of doing that!" America then kept his mout shut as he took out the knife that was pearcing his hand.

* * *

><p>Seychelles ran as fast as her two legs could carry her. sadly, Her efforts were useless sence England easily caught up to her. England then cast a spell on the frightend island nation, wich didn't let her move.<p>

"I can't move!"

"Good."

"Bastard! You cheated!"

"So did you." Seychelles then used as much force as she could and flipped of Arthur.

"How dare you! You belong to me-"

"No I don't! I became independent in the 70's...so you can't tell me what to do!" Seychelles then smilled a smile that had told Iggy his arguments are invalid. Iggy then blushed because he just got invalidated by a weaker, smaller nation.

The blonde nation then approached the island nation and gently tapped her head.

"Tag...you're it." He seductively whispered in her ear, then he ran off. Seychelles stayed there, frozen and blushing.

* * *

><p><strong>I am now officially done with that chapter! Thanks for revewing &amp; please revew!<strong>


	14. Belarus in Crackland 4: End Game

**Oh mien gott...50 MUTTHA FUKKEN REVEWS! THAT IS SO FrUKin AWESOME! EVERYONE NAO GETS A CELEBRATION COOKIE OF EPIC VIRTUALNESS! I LOVES YOU ALL SO MUCH! (No homo/lesbo lol)**

* * *

><p>America looked up at Belarus, and noticed that there was something on her finger.<p>

"Belaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarus."

"What is it now, America?"

"Umm, so I just noticed, there's somethin' on your finger." Belarus then looked at her pinkie finger and gasped. "What? What is it?"

"I remember Japan saying something about a red string on people's fingers." She said.

"What does it mean?"

"I can't remember...but it's probably not good." She then took a good look at America and smiled. "You have it too." She then noticed her string was conected to America's.

"I KNOW! This thing could mean death for all we know! I DON'T WANNA DIE!" The male nation then jumped and grabbed the female. Chances are that these two creatures will most loikley take a sexual intres-

* * *

><p>"SAY WHAAAAAAAT?" The snooping nations said in unison as they turned around and saw a certain Male Aussie standing there.<p>

"Australia! This is not one of your weird nature shows!" Hungary yelled out.

"Well, sorry, but oi thought this needed some narrirating!"

"No, this does not need narrirating...just go Australia!" Austria then responded.

"Foine, but if ya start gettin' less vews, don't come cryin' to me!" Then he left.

* * *

><p>"America! Get off me! You're heavy!" Belarus yelled out.<p>

"BUT BELLA, THE GHOSTS MIGHT KILL ME!"

"Who said anything about ghosts!" America then let go of Belarus. The North American nation had tears in his eyes and was shaking like Latvia after a seeing a drunk and angry Russia. "Now, we have to figure out how to get his string off out fingers. Do you have siccors?"

"I already tried..." America stated so sadly.

"Okay..." She then grabbed a knife from a strap around her leg and started slicing at it. America gasped and almost cried when the string was not cut.

"I DON'T WANNA DIE!" America broke out in tears sudenly. Belarus had never seen America cry, ever, so this came as a surprise to her. She had heard many stories of America's greatest fears. Ghosts, Terrorists, and death were only a few of many. She felt sorry for him, on the floor, crying, knowing that one of his greatest fears had won the fight.

"America, you will not die." She knelt down to his level and sweetly had told him that.

"You...you promise?" He asked with his brokenish voice. Belarus the stuck out her free pinkie, waiting for America to wrap his pinkie around it. That would make the promise official.

"Alfred, I promise. Chances are that this string does not even have death involved." She smiled as she helped out the nation in front of her. "Now, let's go fing England and Seychelles. The game is probably over."

* * *

><p><strong>And that, has been the last Belarus in wonderland chappie! Yup...the game is over...but not for Iggy and Sey-Sey! Next chappie is all Iggy &amp; Sey-Sey fighting it out.<strong>

**Thanks for reading & revewing & please revew! ;)**


	15. Pointless conversation

** I lied bout the whole Seychelles/Iggy chapter. Lol...oh well, THIS AINT ABOUT THEM, IS IS? Whatever. Story starts...now!**

* * *

><p>"If I die young, bury me in satin Lay me down on a, bed of roses Sink me in the river, at dawn Send me away with the words of a love song."<p>

"America, if you do not stop singing that song then you WILL die young!"

"Sorry, it got stuck in my head."

"Well, get it out of your head. Why would you even listen to a song that sounds as femenine as that one?"

"Tennessee...I blame her."

"Who'se Tennessee?"

"One of my kids."

"You have kids?"

"Yes, 51."

"YOU HAVE 51 KIDS?"

"Yes, the states and DC."

"That's a lot of kids. Most countries only have in between one and nine."

"Really?

"Yes, My only child is Minsk. Sister Ukraaine's only child is Kiev. Brother Russia has two, Siberia and Moscow."

"I know Mexico has 31. They all keep trying to get into my house, it's annoying."

"I guess countries in North America are used to having lots of children."

"So, there's countries on my head?"

"No. Are you really that stupid?"

"I'm not stupid! I'm the smartest person I know!"

"Your also ignorant."

"What does that mean?"

"Ugh, never mind."

* * *

><p><strong>Lol, nothing but a conversation in this chapter. pretty random. btw, I really do hate that song, it's stupid. xD<strong>


End file.
